Its official. Old blue died tonight. He's been a good companion for a long time and was always there for me in times of need. I knew he was on his last leg, but its still always a shock when it finally happens.

Thanks for the memories Blue.

Shit. Now I'm going to have to go shopping to find a replacement. I hate going by myself! Anyone? Road trip?

OK so I've been thinking. I know I have said lately about fate and what happens is supposed to happen... But my b-day is coming up and I have some money saved. I was planning on getting LASIK done, but then thought what if I use that instead to have a baby? I could go to a clinic and pick out the perfect guy. I mean the last couple of guys I went out with both said the same thing when I mentioned I wanted marriage and a baby. "I can give you one of those things, but not the other. I've had a vasectomy." What do you think that means? Both guys. And people keep saying "it'll happen" but when? How long do I wait? Its been ten years. Is that not long enough? Why should I wait to meet the one - when I know I can do it myself? Go to a bank, order a good Jewish guy sperm and be done with it.

I don't know. I'm just thinking out loud. But I am thinking seriously.